Friday, March 13, 2009

Nigerian Men (tality) 7

Seventh (re)post of reminiscing the Men (tality) that haunts me.

Okay....sometime when I was 16 years old, my mum had to be away oversees a lot..actually doing a masters program so I had to assume duty as the market goer...lol

I hated markets. At least even though my parents raised us like ajebos. Deep inside we knew we weren't really..okay just a little but I could go to Wuse market and buy groceries (groceries??? who in 9ja says that...you mean foodstuff??? ha, YES!)

I started going to the market with our maid. She'll buy the fresh stuff meat (beef, goat, kpomo, chicken) and all (when the ajebo monster enters me) and I'll buy the canned, tinned and packaged stuff.

Sha, there was this cheaper Alhaji my mum used to go to and told me to go (9ja system of customers and getting 10naira discounts). So I used to go to him with my shopping list and his boys will get the stuff on a wheel barrow and I'll pay, catch up with Aunty Dorcas and head home.

This Alhaji knew my mum was always abroad and then evil spirits posses ed him. He started asking for my number (I was 16) and he was not 16, 17, 18 or 19 (my limit). You can guess his age but old enough to be arrested and presented before the Kano Sharia courts. He was actually fine though like those fair Fulani boys-ish (Not complexion conscious oh before I get whacked!)

He continued this whole thing "Ki ba ni numban ki!" ("give me your number") until as I was trying to pay one day, he decided to take his flirting to a physical level. I exaggerate, but as I was counting the notes his finger was almost-basically-disgustingly tracing mine (hand raping I call it). I'm bad at description but you can picture the old man with an innocent 16 year old.

I realized the only way to go was to run...run fast. Not really, just find another place to shop. I went to the more expensive Alhaji's store which ended up being the 'bestest' place to shop. I talked to him last month.

(My mum made me talk to him on the phone when SHE went to the market= Very respectable man.) Don't get me wrong abeg. Its like commending my dads friend oh.

I'm going to Abuja this summer and I need to hire a body guard...applications anyone?

Kidding y'all!

I'm well equipped for nonsense!

Ladi

4 comments:

LMAO!!!

ah, naija old men... i remember the way those old gatemen do SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! aggressively when you pass... *sigh* pele dear.... :0)

Welcome to Abj! Hope you have your pepperspray ready. 'Flit' them once and they'll b shy of you forever :-)
Hav a good stay. Cheers.

LOL.. I served in the north for a while.

It always seemed given to see young girls with older men.. when you did see them of course..

Lol @ hand raping..

Lecherous old men..the world is filled with them! Mschew!

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